Last Friday I made one of my students cry. It was a one to one exam. I just told her that she had two minutes left to finish her presentation, and she started the "cry routine". 1) The eyes fill up with tears that multiple eyelid batting can't keep in check, 2) nasal mucus fluidifies abundanly, 3) general redness spreads on face and chest, 4) the student should look like it's about to eject from its seat. The next thing you know, the Niagara is sitting in your classroom. Oh, she had soooo many things to say (ahah,... [Lire la suite]
"The Little House in the Sink" is a remake for lilliputian foodies, but they had to give it up afterthe actors complained of chilblains and chronic athlete's foot. What a great shame.
After I tied my hair in a black handkerchief and put on a reasonably unwelcoming if not threatening face, I set myself to the cooking of the ragù. I deliberately ignored the original family recipe my own mamma tried to push forward, deciding to give Locatelli's a go. The complete recipe is to be found on Chefs Gone Wild, a great blog orchestrated by a Gâteau Basque god (kudos again)(toutes mes ficelles de caleçon). For any question, please go and nag him. Anyway, by the time you're done that's what you're going to be bopping by: ... [Lire la suite]
Brace yourself, Barilla, here comes Mamma Chiara. No fussing about, straight to the point: 200g flour100g fine semolina3 eggs1/2 tsp salta glug of olive oil (what, not precise? Do not get on the wrong side of Mamma Chiara.)a tub of Elbow Grease (no, it's not like self-tanning lotion. Rather the contrary) Mix all the ingredients and knead for 10 minutes. Wrap in cling film and leave that sexy thing to rest for about 30 minutes. It's called beauty sleep. Cut out the ball of dough in fourand roll... [Lire la suite]
Dear Z, Happy %§#** Birthday, man! Have a mini vanilla and white chocolate jelly!I find it silly to stick bits of mint on top of everything, but no candles were available so I figured it would be ok, but just this once.
Who said this blog couldn't be rude AND pretentious? Take a walk on the bling-bling side with me today. As I tend to be nice, and also because, let's not forget, I am a teacher (by the way, health and safety, guys, health and safety is key), translation will be on me today. Don't sweat it (vous bilez pas), it's the most innocuous recipe ever. I would go as far as saying that it is even HEALTHY. Don't run away. I thought translating it into Italian would make it look a teeny-weeny more classy, because what it is, is soup, made... [Lire la suite]
Do you remember those shiny exciting days when you were young and foolish and thought that eating a teaspoon of chocolate powder was bound to be a more intense experience than, say, dissolving the powder in a predictably boring bowl of hot milk? Yeah, you do. You also remember coughing so much the powder would actually come out of your nostrils and make you look like Puff the Magic Dragon. Oh, do sing along, you wusses! Now you're all grown up and still silly (bless your cotton socks) but you drink coffee more... [Lire la suite]
Dear friends, Colloquial cookin' is here to help you: 1- prepare for your next cooking holidays in France. Swearing will make helping hands chop/peel/clean up faster, it will also ease the pain when you accidentally squirt lemon juice in your eyes. 2- sound professional in your kitchen by swearing in an appropriate language, i.e. one that the kids do not understand. Colloquial cookin' declines all responsabilities if you get punched or thrown out of a restaurant subsequently to using any phrase found on this blog. ... [Lire la suite]